“Dear Leah

 I am so confused my fiancé is only the second man I have slept with and he keeps telling me I’m a sex addict because I want to have sex every day. How can this make me a sex addict? Is he right? What is the normal amount of times someone should want to have sex? We got engaged quite quickly after a whirlwind six week romance and have been engaged for two months.

He’d  be happy to have sex once a week. He’s forty and I’m twenty two. I don’t know if this makes a difference? He’s really fit for his age, very sexy. I can’t keep my hands off him! I find his behaviour so odd and hurtful. Maybe he doesn’t find me attractive?

Please help.


Dear Lisa-Marie

Based on what you say here, I don’t think you are a sex addict. You are able to refrain and you aren’t being unfaithful, your sexual appetite seems healthy given the newness of your relationship and your recent engagement.

While the age gap might be part responsible it is only one possible reason. People’s sex drives do vary and quite simply he might have a lower sex drive naturally. He could be tired from work, or stressed, these will also affect sex drive.

If  you can’t find a happy medium you may have to rethink getting married until you have communicated more about this issue. Explain how you feel and ask him how he feels. He might be worried he can’t satisfy you and that you will stray. Reassure him this isn’t the case and that you just find him very desirable. Him and only him.

I hope this helps.

Readers are invited to offer their advice also.

Leah x

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